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Tag Archives: Personal
Luck and hope and some other senseless things ..
Hey ! Hope you like my blog ! Leave a comment if you wish :)
A friend said, during chat on im
As I see, luck can take you only till a point
and continued,
after that, it is all again luck.
Funnily painful. Or painfully funny.
**
These days, my biggest problem is to communicate and clarify to others, that I am not negative (pessimist) and at the same time, I am not a positive person (optimist) – I am (or at least want to be) at the middle ground. And that I am comfortable being there..and that I am quite sure that my mentality does not affect any outcome, but everyone opposes me.
But the problem is at times I get myself confused what I am.
Am I positive just to console myself and just because it is good to be so ?
**
It is bad already that one has to justify himself..but it is worse, when I fail in that..
The side effect is a conclusion which is quite as useless as it could get – hopelessness is not the worst pain…it is helplessness.
**
Am I really as strong as I think I am..or as much as I wish..or as much as I come across..or as much as I try to show ?
**
Does it really matter .. to be strong from outside when I realize that is not me from inside.. to be positive on the outlook when I realize deep within that many things don’t make sense..
[Including the consolations generously offered that again rely on .. hope, future ... the shallow ones which the offerers too realize does not make sense when offered back when they go through a lean phase. I feel guilty for being evil in returning their favours and smiling under nose to have made them realize how shallow their words were..yes I am an evil guy, sometimes.. 
]
Does it really matter that I laugh..and make others laugh..when all I want to do is cry out loud standing atop a hill till I get tired and watch the sunset alone and fall asleep counting the stars ?
HNY09 :)
Years ago, I used to do yearly goal setting and appraisal of the same (2005, 2006, 2007). Somehow, last year there was a lull on this blog. Not that there was nothing to say, but time whizzed past me.1. But yes, nothing much happened in 2008.
Time flies. Almost every month of the las years are photographically in front of me.
Went on fewer tours than ever, watched perhaps fewer movies/plays, read hardly any books,took fewer photos, wrote fewer blog posts. Feeling sad that did not write the reviews to all the plays I watched at RS, something I wanted to do.
Met fewer friends or relatives, but yes attended a series of functions/engagements/weddings. Almost weekly, for few months.
Sprained my knee (which has been abused by me for many years now and many sprains) and 2 of 3 doctors suggested an operation. In an unrelated separate consulting, a specialist trivialized my existence (well almost to that effect).
Nothing was done towards maintenance of this blog.
So where did my time go ? Travel to office eats up 3 hours of my daily life, an hour or so goes away in reader and other browsing. Weekend goes just like that. Time flies I tell ya.
On positives, bought a car.
Played around with beard styles
Attended french class.
Joined YT workshop.(Lots to talk about the experience..)
Gave a try at Nokia Design Challenge
And yeah, Talked A LOT. Wrote a LOT. Chatted(im) a LOT. Browsed a LOT.
Time flies.
And there were a couple of important things(1,2,3) which I will write in separate posts sometime later.
Resolutions (yeah not goals):
- At least
3 ..no 2no, at least ONE post aweek.FortnightMonth. There are many random thoughts to blurt out, and if nothing else, could use this space as a journal. - Be less verbose
- Be less expressive.
There are some goals I want to internalize but don’t know how far I will succeed, not particular to the year but to forever is that :
- Measure everything. Measure,measure,measure. ( Everything ..time spent, money spent, eating ..everything.)
- Prioritize things/people.
Wish…
My only wish…is that my next year post should not be so mediocre like this..it should have some nice things, significant happenings in my life this year. [actually There are two things I could have wished..and those have been wished at every star-falling, at every eyelash-uff-ing, so am quite sure those will not happen 
]
And finally, Thanks to everyone who have made my 2008 memorable.
[1]It feels just yesterday that previous new year was here. I still have a ‘draft’ post HNY08 with a review and goal setting..and some photos of corn2
[2]Most notable thing about 20073 was that I ate sweetcorn as much as twice or thrice the sweet corn I must have eaten all my previous years put together. In contrast, in 2008, it was a total NILL.
[3]Most important happening of 2007 was a dream US tour..the only tour I didn’t write a log of, much as I wished to. It was a dream tour and a lifetime memory. Some memories
Expecting the world to treat you fairly…
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because because you are a good person is like expecting the lion not to attack you because you are a vegetarian.
From a forward which had other inane quotes like Gandhi said “Love your enemies” and Nehru said “Laziness is our worst enemy” , the above made quite some sense.
**
On the other day I had a moment of enlightenment when I realized suddenly that complaining “Life is unfair” is quite uncalled for, given that “no one” “promised” it to be otherwise. It was you who set the requirements and/or expectations.
Asking “So what” after every question helps sometimes.
**
Totally personal cribbing though hoping that it is context-independent.